I've been back in the states for about two weeks now. All my bags have long been unpacked, but I am just beginning to unpack all that God has revealed to me through the amazing experiences I had in Sydney. He has grown my heart for students even more than it already was. He has given me a heart and a desire to truly love and pray for the people of Australia. I hope that one day soon I get to see all my new, sweet friends there again. But even beyond the actual experience, God is (and has been since April) stirring up something in me. Something big. Something different. Maybe it's multiple something(s). I'm not 100% sure what it is either. But I do know one thing...
...I am stinkin' FIRED UP!
I haven't felt this alive in a while, and while it excites me, it also scares me a little. Partially because I know myself - I can get super excited about the potential of something or what's to come, but get distracted by the "tyranny of the urgent" and lose the wind in my sails...then get mad at myself for losing focus, and so on and so on. It's a vicious cycle. Part of me is scared/excited because I feel like I might be venturing into uncharted territory in my life. But seriously God, no matter how much I might kick and scream at times, bring it on. I need it. I desire it. We're called to it, by you.
My small group is reading an amazing book right now by Francis Chan called "Crazy Love." I'm not kidding when I say this book is seriously rocking my world. If you haven't read it, go get it. Now. Seriously, stop reading this blog, go order it on Amazon and come back.
Go ahead, i'll wait.... :)
Ok, did you do it? Good! Anyways...In the book, Francis makes a great point. He says:
"Life is comfortable when you separate yourself from people who are different from you. But God doesn't call us to be comfortable. He calls us to trust Him so completely that we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations where we will be in trouble if He doesn't come through."
Then Francis asks a great question that I realized I need to be asking myself DAILY:
"What are you doing right now that requires faith?"
As I hashed this question out with my small group tonight, yes, I realized that there are some big things in the past year that I have done that required faith, but how much am I asking myself that daily, in the small things AND the large things to come? I think I have been missing out on tons of opportunities to do so, simply because I haven't been consciously asking myself this question on a regular basis.
Back in April, I honestly prayed hard that God would make my 28th year a "year of transformation." So far, He has seriously answered my prayer in ways that I would have never imagined. But I think there's more to come. I know there's more to come. So what's next, you ask? I'm not quite sure yet...but I do know that i'm ready.
And i'm excited...not because I know what's on the horizon - because I have no idea what's to come.